The Birth Story

I was surprised at how many people wanted to know about Afton's birth story. Of course, it was all other mom's, regular people would rather be forced to watch 12 consecutive hours of the Golden Girls then listen to someones birth story. What is it about other mom's that makes us want to know "was her labor as bad as mine?" Just to be clear: every one's labor was the worst thing ever. But, it is sometimes nice to know that you're not the only one it happened to.

I really thought that Afton was going to come on her own, she had a different opinion about that. So we got scheduled to get induced on May 21. They called us at 5:15 a.m. (why on earth so early???) and Melodie came over right away to stay with Brody (thanks Melodie). We were able to be at the Utah Valley Regional Medical Center at 6. After doing all the paperwork, getting checked into our room, and getting changed into my fabulous hospital gown they started the IV with pitocin at exactly 7 a.m. Riley and I had taken a special 'How to Have a Baby' class and we had brought all of our supplies including: heat packs, massage stuff, pillows, focal points, papers on how to breath, DVD's, music, books, EVERYTHING.I was determined to be prepared this time around.

After they started my IV I immediately started feeling contractions every 3 minutes. I guess that stuff works pretty quick on me. The problem I found was that I had to go to ladies room like, every 5 minutes. They hook you up to an IV with water going into you and you already have 7 pounds sitting directly on your bladder, can't they just give you a bed pan or something? Anyway, Riley was so great at unhooking all my cords and such so I could use the ladies room every time. We were 15 minutes into 30 Rock when my contractions started to get worse. And I had to go to the little girls room, again. Riley unhooked me and helped me into the bathroom. Then he left (even if I am in labor I am not letting him see me tinkle!)

In the ladies room I started to think 'I wonder if I should ask the nurse for my epidural?' Then I said to myself 'You are such a baby! You haven't even been here an hour yet, you can't get an epidural!' No joke, right when I was thinking that my water broke. And then, AAAAGH! I felt the baby coming out! I was so worried that my baby was going to come out in the potty! Can you imagine a worse beginning to life? Being born in a potty? So I yelled to Riley to grab the nurse who, seeing that I had been off the monitor for a while, was coming to check on me anyway. She helped me back to the bed (whew, no baby in the potty) and gave a quick little peek down there. She yelled at Riley to press the nurses button again and she told the nurse that answered "We have a Code White in here!" Then over the intercom on the whole floor we heard "Attention! There is a Code White in room (whatever room we were in)!" Apparently 'Code White' means 'baby a-comin'!'

Our room immediately filled up with tons of nurses and two men in scrubs that we determined must have been residents or something. They were all so prompt (thanks staff at UVRMC!) The nurses were all asking where the doctor was and they determined there wasn't time to wait for a doctor. So one man put on gloves to catch and the other man stood to the side and gave useful advice like "catch the baby when it comes out." (Thanks genius). I then proceeded to give birth without even the benefit of a Tylenol or anything. Me! I am the kind to take an aspirin if I think I might be getting a paper cut later on in the day! Just so you know, doing it natural hurts and I did NOT keep my cool under pressure (I yelled a ton). But she came out and was healthy and beautiful. Her head wasn't even pointy because she just shot out so quick. She was born at exactly 8:03. Total labor time 1 hour and 3 minutes. My doctor came in about 5 minutes after she was born and shook my hand. I'm sure he left thinking 'easiest $5000 I ever made!'

So there you have it. The birth story. Isn't it crazy how something so horrific (labor) can end in something so cute? BTW, Little Afton is one month old today! She is such a precious little girl. Hooray for babies!